TixMas Is Here! 2022: The Retaliators Bring Back the Soundtrack (Just the Ticket #120)

Article by Sean Wilkinson,

a.k.a. The TixMaster

The day is finally here!

And I don't just mean Christmas, either. I've been hearing about The Retaliators for months now (thanks to Skratch 'n' Sniff's The Retaliators Halloween Movie Mix), and not only did I finally get the opportunity to watch it, but I listened to The Retaliators Soundtrack as well.

And guess what? The Retaliators is a Christmas horror movie!

So what better way to celebrate Christmas and cap off my thirteen-day Countdown to TixMas special than by reviewing The Retaliators and its soundtrack!?

As I said last time, I struggled with the best way to review these two pieces of media without spoiling one or the other, as many of the songs on the soundtrack are played at key moments in the movie, and snippets of dialogue from the movie are used to introduce some songs on the soundtrack. Thanks to the fortuitous release of Violent Night this week, I don't have to split them up anymore!

Okay, I'm done repeating what I'm going to review now, so like and comment down below, and I'll get started after the jump.

Back in the late '90s and into the mid-2000s, I was a big WWF/WWE fan. When WWE started their own film division to promote their talent on the big screen (The Rock, John Cena, Kane, and Batista most notably), I likewise would jump at the chance to see (and thereafter, review) each film and performance. I check in every once in awhile to see if anything rekindles my interest, but those days are mostly behind me.

Then, there's Better Noise Music. Better Noise is like the WWE of modern rock and metal. They produce and promote acts like Five Finger Death Punch, Papa Roach, AWOLNATION, and...Nelly Furtado? Huh. I'm surprised. You can check out the full client list at betternoise.com/artists. They even have their own film division, which is how we got the Motley Crue biopic, The Dirt. And how The Retaliators came to be.

I'm going to be honest; when I saw the trailer, I was not prepared to accept that Michael Lombardi (the perpetual probationary fire-fighter and butt of almost every joke in Rescue Me's script) could be taken seriously as the badass lead of a horror movie that is stuffed to bursting with heavy metal cameos (Tommy Lee as a bartender at a strip club that's owned by a biker gang being portrayed by Five Finger Death Punch, just as an example). And the premise was another "stop me if you've heard this one:" a meek and unassuming [parent] goes looking for revenge when their [child or pet] is brutally murdered by an overzealous [criminal], and gradually becomes a badass force of vengeance through a string of increasingly intentional and gory kills (see my Peppermint review for examples of other such films).

At least, that's one part of it. The Retaliators is one of those "begin in the middle of the ending, then see how we got there and what happens next" narratives that throws a lot of pieces of different kinds of movies at you. The "beginning" is a "zombies/rabid humans kill stalled road-trippers in the woods" movie. The first act sets up the kind of movie that the trailer suggests it is, with Lombardi's "turn the other cheek" Pastor Bishop (yes, he is a sermon leader whose last name is also a high religious position, and yes, he is so cool that he can get From Ashes to New to play him onstage, and yes, he does acknowledge Die Hard as a Christmas movie) buying Christmas gifts and a tree with his two daughters. The oldest daughter is going to a dance later in the week, so guess who fits in the above [child or pet] slot? That's right; on the way to the dance, she runs afoul of a sadistic biker (Thor's Joseph "Joey" Gatt) with a fondness for zip-ties and trapping people in cars. Through dialogue exchanges with Detective Jed Sawyer (whom I spent the whole film calling "Jed Zamillionaire" for my own amusement, played by Person Of Interest guest-star Marc Menchaca), Pastor Bishop learns of the biker's identity, and is offered the opportunity (via some hints at a "secret revenge fantasy/torture porn society" movie happening in the background) to confront and inflict excruciating but cathartic amounts of pain and suffering upon the man. But when Bishop realizes that Sawyer is creating his own Perkins 14 out of the scum of the Earth, the movie we all expected The Retaliators to be because of the trailer ends. Also, totally oblivious of Bishop's or Sawyer's involvement in the disappearance of sadistic biker Ramon Kady (Gatt's character), the "biker gang war" movie takes care of itself via a montage that's set to my personal hype song (the Death Punch Gang become their own just desserts a bit later on).

My only gripe with The Retaliators (besides there being so much time spent on at least five different movie plots worth of character establishment, only for the majority of them to just kill each other while having minimal impact on the main plot) is when Bishop pulls a Maisie Lockwood and frees Sawyer's rabid prisoners. Yes, it fits his character's philosophy and world view. But he just watched a cage full of ravenous sub-humans try to cannibalize one of their own, and he fucking lets them go!

Fortunately, we then get a suiting-up montage, plenty of excessively gory and creative kills and fight choreography, and Michael Lombardi doing some blood-drenched, campy face-pulls out of this that reminded me fondly of the Evil Dead movies. Seriously: no one can replace Bruce Campbell, but if Evil Dead Rise doesn't work out, there needs to be a reboot with Michael Lombardi playing Ash Williams. I loved this part! And it leads into the "middle of the ending" scene we saw at the beginning.

Looking back on the movie, and one of the girls from the opening saying "you're taking me to slaughter?", I kind of got the feeling that one of them fully intended to kill the other, but Sawyer's escapees gave them both what was coming to them.

Then, things transition to what looks like a deleted scene from M. Night Shyamalan's The Visit, with an elderly couple living out in the woods who are cleaning up after Christmas. After some seemingly extraneous dialogue from the couple, and scenes of menial labor that would typically get one killed in this kind of movie, we learn that Ram Kady is still alive, and begins accosting the old woman for the keys to her truck so he can escape. I knew how this would go from the moment I saw the equipment that the old man was operating, sort of like one of those Rube-Goldberg kills from Final Destination, but my excitement built with every second of suspense and brutal fight choreography between Bishop and Kady, up through the climactic battle's gory and satisfying conclusion.

And the thematic bookending scene at the batting cages? The movie's theme song kicking in for the credits? Just perfect!

TixMaster's Note: I watched The Retaliators during a long lunch break, during an even longer work day that was imposed upon me because someone decided to quit at the last minute. And when the fight was over, I could be heard from downstairs, clapping loudly and slowly and saying, "yes! Yehehehes! YES!" I gave the batting cage scene an "oh my God; so good!" And (having heard the theme song, which I will also review later in this post, many, many times, I sang along to it as enthusiastically off-key as I dared. I then sent the following IM to Decker Shado (the internet personality with the best hair):

So what did I really think of The Retaliators? It's right alongside Prey and Werewolf By Night as one of the best, most fun things I've seen this year. It had its apparent focus problems and a glaring "idiot plot" moment near the end. But it wasn't your run-of-the-mill, "aggrieved parent out for revenge" movie. Whether or not it was strictly important to the plot, every moment had thematic weight to it. The Retaliators wasn't just about a father getting catharsis for his grief or growing as a tragic hero; it was about how one cop's obsession over a crime led to his becoming just like the villain he despised most (a serial rapist--with Cape Fear finger tattoos--who numbers and dehumanizes his victims, portrayed by Papa Roach frontman, Jacoby Shaddix); it was about how the actions of one reckless man (Joseph Gatt's Ramon Kady) can lead to the Shakespearean downfall of an entire criminal ecosystem; it's a bloody, entertaining character study on the nature of grief, revenge, and the balance of good and evil; and it's a Christmas movie!

Michael Lombardi proved himself as a serious actor and a strong leading man, Joseph Gatt played an imposing, sinister villain with subtle charisma, and the rocker cameos (especially Jacoby Shaddix and the Death Punch crew) showed that they have the potential for careers outside of music. I could see Jacoby doing dramatic and comedic roles, or Ivan Moody showing up in Mayans MC or something. And the third act made everything leading up to it more than worth the wait. Did I mention it was fun!?

A-

Then there's the music.

I haven't done a review like what I'm about to do since Yelawolf's Love Story back in 2015. Wow.

Bring Back the Soundtrack #6: The Retaliators

Original Motion Picture Soundtrack

I'll be going track by track on here, saying whether the song was featured in the movie, and my thoughts and feelings about it.

1. "Sometimes if you’re lucky …it’s better to keep evil alive.": Intro quote by Michael Lombardi.
2. Papa Roach - The Ending: plays while the girls are driving through the woods at the beginning. The instrumentation reminds me a little bit of "Razor's Edge" by AC/DC, but with a more industrial, swampy sound like it belongs in a Ninja Turtles movie. A solid rap-rock track that let fans know Papa was back, though it's a bit repetitive later on with the chess metaphors and "Jumpin' Jack Flash"-inspired lyrics.
3. "We have to get out of here … those aren’t zombies…": dialogue between Lombardi and one of the girls from the "middle of the end at the beginning" scene. Iconic trailer bait.
4. The HU - This Is Mongol: I love The HU! The Mongolian throat singing, the unique instruments, the songs that you can feel without even understanding the lyrics. It's a fun, energizing song, but not my favorite thing I've heard from them.
5. Eva Under Fire - Blow (feat. Spencer Charnas of Ice Nine Kills): This is the equivalent of when Kid Rock screamed over that Nickelback cover of "Saturday Night's Alright (For Fighting)." I mean, Nickelback covering Elton John is bad enough (I actually liked the non-Charlie's Angels version, though), but to go in expecting a remix with nu-metal rap verses, only to get an off-key howl 'n' growl just ruined that version for me. Likewise, I enjoy the radio version of "Blow." It's an upbeat, chick-metal track with smoky, sassy vocals about sexual aggression, addiction, and destructive behavior, and I'm here for it. But as much as I like Ice Nine Kills, too, this song was written for Amanda Lyberg's range, and Spencer cannot harmonize with her to save his life.
6. From Ashes To New - Scars That I'm Hiding (feat. Anders Fridén of In Flames): The song that the band plays at Pastor Bishop's first sermon in the movie. The lyrics are good foreshadowing of what Bishop's emotional state will be later on, but subjectively, it's a generic, repetitive song about emotional damage that's generically played and generically emo-screamed.
   
7. "Tell me you have a lead or something …": Bishop asking Sawyer to give him information on Kady. It usually works in revenge spree movies, but not here.
8. Asking Alexandria - Faded Out (feat. Within Temptation): There is a version out there that doesn't have the Within Temptation verse, and it's not as good. No matter what version you listen to, it's a song about living life on autopilot and dealing with imposter syndrome, the electric guitar melody is sick and scratchy, and the Asking Alexandria vocals are impressive. But that Within Temptation rap verse that unleashes a torrent of bars, giving the impression of an overwhelmed mind spinning out of control, followed by the dramatic heavy breathing and brief silence before the final chorus slams back in? That makes this track for me.
9. Tommy Lee- Tops (feat. Push Push): I think this is playing during the establishing shot of the Death Punch gang's strip club, where we see Tommy Lee as a DJ. Good cockney rap with some creative wordplay by Push Push, but I feel like the billing should have been switched.
10. Classless Act - Classless Act (feat. Vince Neil of Mötley Crüe): generic, fun track with that hair metal flavor (strong, "Kickstart My Heart" vibes). But it didn't stand out to me amidst the other bangers on this album.
11. "I had a nightmare … where are you going?": Rebecca Bishop (the pastor's surviving daughter) being scared for (and of) her father's erratic behavior as he leaves to ponder his course of vengeance. Great lead-in to the next scene and song.
12. Five Finger Death Punch - Darkness Settles In: Some criticize FFDP for patriot-pandering, excessive reliance on cover songs, and most of the lyrics being about Ivan Moody's personal struggles. There is some truth to that, but I like most of their covers, I like songs with personal meaning or a story to them, and I'm an armchair patriot, so consider me pandered. This is one of those Ivan Being Moody tracks, and if you've heard an FFDP song before, you've heard this one, too. But in the context of the movie, it plays while Bishop is sitting in his car, processing his grief and bursting into a "beat the shit out of the steering wheel" fit that you see in a lot of movies and shows, and the mellow buildup to the more intense part of the song fits really well with what Bishop is experiencing at the time.
13. Nothing More - Tired Of Winning / Ships In the Night: Johnny's vocals are insanely good no matter what the band puts out. This is one of those "the world since 2020 is horrible" anthems that's gotten a lot of airplay these past few years, but the energy of the instrumentation is crazy good.
14. Crossbone Skully - Evil World Machine: sounds like something AC/DC would have recorded to fill a vacancy on Black Ice. Like, literally, between the Johnson-esque vocals, the repetitive lyrics, and the sleepy 80s metal instrumentation, you'd never know Crossbone Skully existed.
15. "How’d you like your one minute … In the police station…": Sawyer suddenly willing to give Bishop what he wanted back at Track Seven. Very suspicious, isn't it?
16. The HU – Wolf Totem (feat. Jacoby Shaddix of Papa Roach): this is playing when Kady's brother (played by Ivan Moody) decides to go to montage war with the rival biker faction and wipe them out. With or without the English vocals by Jacoby, this track gets me pumped. The string intro gives me goosebumps, the building, pounding drums are like a musical defibrillator, and the lyrics in any language speak of a triumphant hunting call powerful enough to make an ant feel like it could solo an elephant. My personal hype track, my favorite HU song, and my favorite song of the decade.
17. Bad Wolves - If Tomorrow Never Comes (feat. Spencer Charnas of Ice Nine Kills): Bad Wolves got on the map with their cover of The Cranberries' "Zombie." Both "Zombie" and this generic, carpe diem metal track have gotten a ton of play over the past year, and the cover is the superior of the two. I didn't even register Spencer as a guest voice on this one.
18. Cory Marks - Burn It Up: the sinister, whispered/screamed intro is good, but then it turns into "If Tomorrow Never Comes," Pyromaniac Edition.
19. Tempt - Living Dangerous (feat. Dorothy): this song has clear Van Halen "Jump" inspirations, Dorothy is one of my favorite new chick-metal bands and vocalists, and the duet vocals are solid. Too bad it's the fourth "live for today" song in a row.
20. "C'mon, pussycat. Let me hear you purr.": Ed, the old man at the end, talking to his woodchipper. Is it Fargo time?
21. Hyro The Hero - Who’s That Playing On The Radio? (feat. Danny Worsnop of Asking Alexandria and Mick Mars of Mötley Crüe): Hyro started as a protest rapper and recently began taking his sound in a rock/metal direction. His voice reminds me of Zack de la Rocha at times, giving his songs kind of a Rage Against the Machine vibe. The title hook by Mars and Worsnop is well harmonized and memorably simple, the guitar and drums are high-energy, and the turntable work is a fun, nu-metal throwback.
22. Cory Marks - Blame It On The Double (feat. Tyler Connolly of Theory of a Deadman and Jason Hook): a snippet of this song plays just before Jacoby's character attacks Sawyer's pregnant wife in a flashback that precedes Track Fifteen. It's one of those badly written, modern country-rock songs that amounts to "you can be a chauvinistic, obnoxious prick as long as you blame the alcohol." Skip!
23. "10 years ago I made alone time ... Time for you to heal.": Sawyer tries to goad Bishop into torturing Kady. It doesn't work.
24. All Good Things - For The Glory (feat. Hollywood Undead): Bishop's suit-up and motorcycle escape track. I'm a sucker for tiptoe baselines, trappy buildup, rap-rock, and hype songs, and this checks all the boxes. 
25. "No cameras … Only complicit men take secrets to the grave.": Sawyer delivering a creative take on the classic, "no witnesses, no one can save you" line. Great mid-boss reveal moment in the film.
26. The Retaliators - The Retaliators Theme (21 Bullets) (feat. Mötley Crüe, Asking Alexandria, Ice Nine Kills, From Ashes To New): plays at the beginning of the credits. All contributing artist vocals work well in harmony and their individual styles, the lyrics reflect the movie's themes of religion, vengeance, loss, consequence, and forgiveness, the alternating moods of the guitar work and the pounding drums are solid; it has the feel of a Fallout Boy anthem like "My Songs Know What You Did In the Dark" or "Centuries." The perfect theme song for an almost perfect movie.
27. The Retaliators, Kyle Dixon, and Michael Stein - Cops Are Here: I feel like this should have been on the score album instead of as the soundtrack closer. "21 Bullets" was already a perfect album closer, so this wasn't needed here. It's a good, creepy, atmospheric instrumental; just not right for this album or this track position.

I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas!

Stay Tuned and wait smart because I'm taking a week off from Blogger to recover from this marathon of thirteen crazy nights, focus on academia, and see what I can come up with for the next part of "What If GOKU Was NEVER BORN?"

It's still Christmas Eve as I'm writing this, so to all a good night, and

TixMaster,

Out!