Just the Ticket

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Ticketmaster No words can describe my disappointment in this episode, and I need to start Hawkeye  before it's over. So if you want to see what led to this inconsistent, gender-fluid genital-tease of a finale before I get to what else F stands for, go binge the first seven episodes at the app of your choice ( USA Network  or  SyFy Channel ) or through your local provider, and read all of my other  Chucky -related coverage at the links below: Welcome to the Dead Parade #12: Chucky Gets Chyerminaydit  ( Child's Play 1-3, Bride,  and  Seed ) Just the Ticket #69: Breaking The Curse of Chucky, Sequel-itis Cured?  ( Curse ) NICE! Welcome To the Dead Parade #14: Chucky's Cult Following  ( Cult ) Episode 1:  Chucky #1: Deth By Misadventure Episode 2: Chucky #2: Give Me Something Good to Eat , and Chucky #2.5: The Coming Of Rage Episode 3:  Chucky #3: I Like To Be Hugged Episode 4:  Chucky #4: Just Let Go Episode 5:  Chucky #5: Little Little Lie

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a The Ticketmaster With so much going on right now for me personally, I've missed out on a lot of reviewable content. Disney Plus Day came and went without much fanfare, I haven't seen Shang-Chi  or the first two episodes of Hawkeye  yet, I'm just now working on this review the day of the season finale, I haven't reviewed any anime in over three months, my Halloween plans to review the Hatchet  series were replaced by Chucky (though if I were less encumbered by work, school, and personal life, I could have planned an actual rollout schedule to stick to and accomplished all of these and more), and I have yet to complete the first class of my final undergraduate year in the accounting program at WGU. A course that I've already taken twice. And failed twice. And I am feeling all the loss. It sucks. But not as bad as having all of your closest friends and family die or otherwise leave you because fatal "accidents" follow you eve

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Guy Who Isn't Sure If It's Okay to Say "Queer" or Not Granted, I just said it. Twice. But when I was growing up, there was a time when "the Q word" had stopped being an old-with-an-e word for strange, unusual, or odd, and started being a sharp, derogatory term for gay men that was only slightly less sharp and derogatory than "the other F word" that British people use to refer to cigarettes. So even though I've been a thinking, feeling part of this world for nearly forty years, said world has become at once so much more open and yet so much more closed off than it once was that I am completely out of touch with what language is "acceptable" or has been "reclaimed" among certain races and lifestyle groups. And being the white-ish, virginal, hetero cis-man that I am, I'm still operating on the instinct of what sounds wrong to my own ears and whatever connection they have to my metaphori

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Ticketmaster Well, my "Charles Lee Ray knew voodoo as a child" theory has been officially debunked. As of last week's episode, we saw Tyler Barrish playing a teenaged Charles Lee Ray, and the once and future killer's grooming of Child's Play loose end, Eddie Caputo, during their time at a home for wayward youths. Add in Charles Lee Ray's fascination with J.M. Barre's favorite youth conservationist (Google wouldn't provide me with the correct "-cide" for the murder of those who reach puberty, so I went the euphemistic route), and it's not only canonically impossible, but psychologically out of character for him, at any age, to consider taking the body of another adult. The appeal he finds in hiding his sinister nature behind an innocent face, the fact that what friends he claims to have call him Chucky, his targeting of children as new host bodies in the first three films, the fact that the majority o

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Ticketmaster Halloween is behind us, and the season of giving has begun. So it's time to forgive our own transgressions and those committed against us, and to be thankful for the blessings in our lives. In other words, sometimes, you have to "Just Let Go." Unless you're the hero of a slasher movie and you literally hold the life of your second-greatest enemy in your hands, but that's a story for a bit later. But before I incorporate any more Chucky  spoilers, go catch up with the series (or just re-watch it, if you're a fan, or a critic working toward more accurate articles--I am both) at the app of your choice ( USA Network  or  SyFy Channel ) or through your local provider. You can also catch up with this interesting critical journey of mine at the links below: Welcome to the Dead Parade #12: Chucky Gets Chyerminaydit  ( Child's Play 1-3, Bride,  and  Seed ) Just the Ticket #69: Breaking The Curse of Chucky, Sequel-i

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Ticketmaster The original version of this article has been lost to time and the grinding teeth of progress in what is known among the masses of maddened former members as "old MySpace." Fortunately, I was able to glean the original post date and issue number from its inclusion in my Greatest Hits  portfolio. As for the reason I chose this particular review to re-release at this particular time? That's a lot of particulars and a lot of "re-"s, but there are two reasons: Willem Dafoe was recently hinted to reprise his role as the Green Goblin in the upcoming Spider-Man: No Way Home , and Clive Owen is currently portraying former U.S. President Bill Clinton in Impeachment: American Crime Story . Both actors star in today's film selection. But before I begin, I'd like to give praise to the makeup artists, and to Clive Owen, for bringing such an immersive performance to this installment of the ACS anthology series (which

Article by Sean Wilkinson a.k.a. He Whom the Haters Don't Believe Writes Articles Yeah. I said in Chucky #2.5: Coming Of Rage  that I was thankful for being called on my fallacies, and I am. I even posted an edited version of my second episode review, expressing a more favorable opinion of it, given accurate information. But I also fired back some shots of my own, and, if you couldn't tell from the above a.k.a., I can be something of a sore sport when it comes to personal attacks, and I can carry a grudge like Martins Licis carries crossfit tires. What can I say? I like to be hugged. With that title drop out of the way, there are still some things I failed to mention. First is the almost dance-like horror trope subversion that took place in the second episode when Chucky was trying to stab Lexy through the bed while she was trying oh so hard to do the thing that (aside from being the most gigantic asshole ever written) most often gets slasher movie characters killed: have sex.

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a The Ticketmaster So, I just found out that the Chucky fandom is incredibly toxic. Why am I surprised? Because the internet is a horror movie and I'm the dumbass who decided to have an opinion in a virtual roomful of venomous, under-educated slasher villains whose twisted code is to only murder people with opinions they don't like. Even worse, I expressed my opinion based on false information. And dumbasses with bad ideas are always surprised when they get murdered. I could go on a rant about how technology is making people dumber, more isolated in their togetherness, angrier, etc. But I'd be repeating myself and not getting to why this post I'm writing right now is even a thing. I could also waste time trashing those who called me pretentious, egotistical, a bad writer, and a minority voice spreading falsehoods from his high horse...so I will because I enjoy what I do, I've been doing it for more than half of their miserable lives, a

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Ticketmaster This has been a tough few weeks back in school. I'm starting my last year of an online Bachelor's Degree in Accounting by doing a retake plan for a class that I failed last term, which is a class that I had to take a new version of because I didn't complete the follow-up class to the original version of it before the software changed. To force a bit of tie-in humor, you might say I tricked myself because I spent too much time smelling my feet, and now I'm stuck with no good-to-eat treats and my metaphorical pants around my ankles. As such, I haven't been in the mood to do much writing, so your  treats (if you feel that way about my coverage of the USA / SyFy dual-network series, Chucky , that is) are much delayed in the giving. To avoid spoilers, download the app of your choice from the above links and get caught up with the first two episodes, including the misnomed "extended cuts," which include cast in

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Ticketmaster I have been a long-time follower of the Child's Play/ [insert "ominous" noun] of Chucky  franchise. It hasn't always been good, but it's been more interesting than some of the better known horror franchises out there. I've already covered the movies in previous posts (I refuse to tarnish my mental image of the franchise by watching the reboot, though, even with Mark Hamill involved in the project), which you can check out at the following links: Welcome to the Dead Parade #12: Chucky Gets Chyerminaydit  ( Child's Play 1-3, Bride,  and  Seed ) Just the Ticket #69: Breaking The Curse of Chucky, Sequel-itis Cured?  ( Curse ) NICE! Welcome To the Dead Parade #14: Chucky's Cult Following  ( Cult ) New episodes will be simulcast Tuesday nights at 9pm PST on the USA and SyFy networks (ask your local provider), or you can stream them via the respective network apps at the link above. Chucky  is also availabl

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Ticketmaster The only word that comes to mind right now is wow . It has been an incredibly long time since I posted one of these (about seven and a half years!), and not only does that make me feel old and serve as yet another reminder of the many ways that I have wasted my time and money since then, it reminds me of all the ways my world, and the world in general, has gotten smaller in the process of getting bigger. I began writing these reviews during my first go-round through college, on several forgotten and defunct platforms (Yahoo! Groups and MySpace, specifically), in a different state, in an era when physical media was king and face-to-face conversation was still making an effort to be the norm. Countless bankrupt companies and discontinued physical rental services, an obsolete programming language (Adobe Flash)--and one too-long pandemic--later, the world is so saturated with ways to instantly self-gratify without the "inconvenience&

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Ticketmaster Another streaming series from Marvel and Disney+ is behind us, and now that there's some breathing room until the next Marvel thing, I thought I'd go back and rate What If...?  as a whole. I mean, everyone else is doing it--if they haven't done it already--and I'm not going to lemming myself off a bridge in the process, so I'm doing a series overview, too. Go get caught up on the series at the link above so I don't spoil anything for you, because it's time to break out some old mechanics from my  Critical Quickies  and Bring Back the Soundtrack  days! Episode 1:  "What If Captain Carter  Was  the First Avenger?"  -- This was a nice, safe way to get people into watching the show. Maybe a little safe in concept with a line or two of awkward delivery, and the animators were clearly finding their footing in some ways, but I didn't hate it. And any way we can get more Peggy Carter is a good way. B+

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a The Ticketmaster Ironic post title, considering I'm writing this much later than I usually would. True, I haven't finished my coverage of the last two episodes until the Monday or Tuesday before the next episode would premiere. But that isn't the important thing. The important thing is that there were supposed to be ten episodes, but, as the title of this post says, the finale came one episode early. In light of the finale's events and cross-referencing with my usual sources, it turns out that I gave you all some erroneous information last time. First of all, I fully believed (as there was  evidence to support this at one time) that the missing episode was cut because it was deemed "too dark" to air. Clearly, the series had already set the darkness bar super-high by foreshadowing the potential death-by-cosmic-war of the T'Challa Star Lord Reality and depicting the revenge-serial murder of the Avengers, the numerous deaths o