Just the Ticket

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The TixMaster 'Tis the eighth day of the Countdown to TixMas ; no poem for the seventh . I wrote that one before this stunt; the results were still quite pleasant. Today, Jack Black and a deadly sin that's known for being green Will bring you some of the dumbest gifts that you have ever seen. A dessert of the smallest size, and disappearing shit Will have you laughing from your eyes and contorting up a fit. Like and comment down below, and you will get to see A brand "new" Ticket Stubs review of Envy ! Every year when I was growing up, Christmas would be the time for useless novelty gifts, like Chia Pets (whose body afros are now considered a health food), The Clapper (for people who are inconvenienced by remote controls and light switches--it had the same packaging as a Chia Pet, by the way), and that plastic reindeer that pooped candy (which was impossible to refill because the toy was discontinued the following year). This year, ...

Article by Sean Wilkinson, MasakoX fan, Animeister, and TixMaster Welcome to the seventh day of the Countdown to TixMas , where crossovers with everything are bound to happen. And today, I'm gifting you all with another part to my What If GOKU Was NEVER BORN? re-write. Last time, in Dragon Blog Z , I did a little retconning to pair Krillin and Mai (saving us all from the Japravity time travel/de-aging wish nonsense that happened with Trunks and Mai in Dragon Ball Super ) and give them two children: a son named Kumu who can fight with a sword-shaped kienzan  (Destructo-Disc in the dub), and a daughter named Marin. The new generation also grew to include Bahdo (the daughter of Tarble and Gure), Bulla (Bulma and Yamcha's daughter), and Straps (the carefree son of Jaco and Tights). You can check out the character art for some of the kids in my first YouTube short . The 25th Martial Arts Tournament ran its course with a few roster changes and Bahdo winning the Junior Division, and ...

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The TixMaster 'Tis the sixth post to TixMas, in Black & White  text. Poems and throwbacks; what will I do next? To find out, like and comment; you all know where. I'll still Countdown to TixMas ; I don't really care. Twelve days of Christmas, or is it thirteen? Six geese a'laying, if  you know what I mean. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night. It's time for a  Ticket Stubs  review of  The Big White . I'm disappointed that I didn't think of doing this opening poem thing sooner. It's kind of fun to drink too much coffee and get all "man from Nantucket" at nine o'clock in the evening. After posting a review of a movie where almost nothing happens besides brooding dialogue and animal cruelty, we need a bit of fun. I know that 'tis the season to be disordered and affected in many SAD ways, but 'tis also the season to be jolly. And nothing says good, mindless holiday fun like a winter-set c...

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The TixMaster 'Tis the fifth night of the Countdown to TixMas , and all through the blog, few readers are reading my holiday slog. This One A Holi Day  special which I have written, today has Zoey Deschanel drowning a kitten. And each line of this poem I'm composing myself hints at a Will Ferrell movie where he doth not play an Elf . But enough of this Christmas-y, poetic half-assing; It's time for a Ticket Stubs  on the film, Winter Passing . As I said at the end of my Guardians Of the Galaxy: Holiday Special  review (and referenced in the above impromptu composition), this post features a review of mine from the "old MySpace" days--you can tell because of the "current mood" tag--of the 2005 film, Winter Passing , in which Elf  stars Will Ferrell and Zooey Deschanel swap billing and take things way  too seriously. The review was originally part of a double-feature post titled SW@ Ticket #54: Black & White , FROM Jul...

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. the TixMaster With fresh snow piling up outside, it's time I had some fresh content for the Countdown to TixMas ! So let's talk about Marvel Studios'  Guardians Of the Galaxy Holiday Special  (now streaming on Disney+ )! Like with the Werewolf By Night  Halloween special , if you've seen the trailer for this, there isn't much to spoil, and it clocks in at under an hour. It delivers on the trailer pretty well, and it's not a huge investment of your time if you want to give it a watch (and like and comment on this post down below) while I load in this image break: The opening animation of "How the Yondu Ruined Christmas" looks good for a TV budget, like something between a Disney direct-to-video sequel and (because this is a GOtG  special) Adam Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights . Christmas, Adam Sandler, relationships, cold stuff, see? It's all connected! ...IT'S ALL CONNECTED! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The TixMaster. I began yesterday's post with a reference to awkward relationships, of which I have been in exactly three. One was kind of perfect, but happened at the wrong time, and she liked to put way  too much melted cheese on everything. It's weird being the flighty, noncommittal one who's afraid to say no, but I guess that's the Universe balancing out my first two, two-timing girlfriends (who were both immature, flighty, noncommittal, and "didn't want to hurt my feelings" by rejecting me. I don't know what happened to the first two-timer, but the second one got noticeably more karmically affected each time she came into the store to shop (usually shortly after I would hear "Don't Do Me Like That" by Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers on the supermarket's looping pop station, because of course it would), and the one who gave me a good (but clingy and cheesy) relationship experience was an amicabl...

Article by Sean Wilkinson, a.k.a. The Omnibuster, a.k.a. The TixMaster Welcome back to the  Countdown to TixMas ! It's the second evening (or morning?) of the special, and since I referenced Jim Carrey in yesterday's post, I'd like to give you all a big  Truman Show  greeting before I begin finding excuses to make this content Christmas-relevant. Like awkward relationships, bells, trees, the counting of animals, dreams coming true, awestruck children, and the Naughty List. See, that wasn't so hard! "Awkward relationships" is more than kind of an understatement, considering where we start out this volume. Just look at the couple in this two-issue story from the  Grimm Fairy Tales series: GFT #13 & 14: The Beauty and the Beast Collection Jenna’s boyfriend, Drew, is angry and jealous, and frequently abuses her, but she stays with him because she sees the good in him (even though he’s a white boy who wears his baseball cap sideways and his bedroom looks like...