Just the Ticket

Good afternoon and happy Throwback Thursday, Ticketholders! I'm unsure about the numbering on this issue because it is a holdover from my days of posting on MySpace and the site has changed so much that I don't know if my account is even up there anymore, but from information I do have from previous posts and hard copy materials, I believe today's Ticketverse Throwback  is  FROM SW@ Ticket #57: Speaking of John Cena... (July 20, 2008) . It was also the final entry from my SW@ Ticket Archive blog before I started submitting fresh posts in Just the Ticket . As promised in this morning's  New Piece Offerings , I now offer you a review of The Champ's performance in what was then tagged as "The Most Explosive Action Movie of the Year." And  The Marine , quite literally, was explosive. A gas station blows up, a bullet-riddled police car catches fire in midair, another (perfectly good) police car is shot with a rocket launcher, a beach house is sent skyw...

Happy Thursday, Ticketholders! What I have for you today might seem cynical and dark, as well as lazy, given the lax posting schedule I have set for myself these two weeks. Next week will feature something meatier, but today's New Piece Offering  is a class assignment FROM Period 3, June 7, 2001 . If I remember correctly, the idea behind the assignment was to take two concepts and write metaphors about them, one simple and one extended. I received a generic, rubber stamp grade of "CREDIT" for completing the assignment (ahh, the milennial-era grading system...). The subject of the simple metaphor was "Freedom." Freedom is a cruel joke, to be told and interpreted many times until it's no longer meaningful. It upsets some and benefits others. Not always funny. At the time, I was in my Junior year of high school, and an avid fan of the WWF -turned- WWE  (because no one wanted Vince McMahon to make pandas hit each other with steel chairs, I guess...

Good morning, Ticketholders! The posting schedule for the next two weeks will be far more relaxed than previously. Since each of the next two Retrospective  issues each cover an entire miniseries, I will only do three posts per week: this column on Friday or Saturday, and Ticketverse Throwbacks and New Piece Offerings  on Thursday. The remainder of each week will be devoted to typing out one of my old hard copy essays for NPO , compiling digital TPBs for future Retrospectives , and taking care of personal matters. With planning formalities out of the way, let's get into this week's miniseries: The Piper Breaking from tradition, The Piper four-part miniseries opens with the fairy tale and lets the action flow from there. At the top left corner of the first panel, we see the familiar markings of a certain book cover. But this book is purple, not red like Sela’s. The first issue’s cover (left, in two print editions) features the Pied Piper sitting and playing his fl...

Salutations, Ticketholders! In the last (and first) issue of Ticketverse Throwbacks , I retroviewed The Reckoning , a period murder mystery starring Paul Bettany and Willem Dafoe. Today, I feel inclined to stay with the period genre and bring you the following selection FROM July 24, 2006 (SW@ Ticket #53: The Eenie-Meenie Cha-Cha Cheenie) .... About the title: don't ask. Just know that it has something to do with a review of Johnny Depp's performance in  The Libertine . In said movie, Depp plays the highly controversial, beheading-worthy Second Earl of Rochester (who just so happens to also be named Johnny, when not referred to by number, title, and/or county). Rochester is a man ahead of his time; an 18th century Keith Richards, an extremely lude poet constantly probing the groins of prostitutes, thorning the side of the king ( Charles II at the time, played exceptionally and unreckognizably by John Malkovich), and liquoring himself in such piratical fashion as to rival ...

This is a poem/rap/whatever that I wrote after I graduated college and left my job at Ralph's (that's Fred Meyer up here in the Northwest), when I was feeling stuck, hopeless, directionless, and generally displeased with myself for how I treated both my professional and academic lives. I think I was staring at an hourglass or one of those perpetual motion oil bead/lava lamp things, and I felt inspired to work through my feelings creatively. So here it is: "The Grain" Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls who would feel His voice flow over us and leave pearls of wisdom like we were polished by a river, but we can't take the current though we love that He's a giver. So we revel in His music as we live in the past, looking for our future as it passes too fast and turns to present; the gift we all squander, watching it slip away (as we all ramble and wander) through our dumbly splayed fingers, We try like hell to save th...

Welcome back, Ticketholders, to the Grimm Fairy Tales Retrospective ! Today, we're wrapping up Volume Two , and if you know the lyrics to the Megadeth song, " Symphony of Destruction ," you'll most likely understand why I chose to make the reference, given the first issue up for review. GFT #12: The Pied Piper Chad (could be an older version of Chad from Red Riding Hood , but there’s nothing to confirm that idea beyond their slightly similar appearances) and his brother Neal are arguing about the latter being investigated for embezzling money from his company. There is an informant (referred to as a "rat" because there has to be a Pied Piper connection), and Neal has hired a hitman to eliminate him, but also plans to cheat the hitman out of his payment as well. When they are later discussing this at a bar, up walks Sela, who pisses off Neal by being psychic and dressing like a hooker. Perhaps a nod to the Chad connection, Sela refers to Neal as a ...

Good morning, Ticketholders. After some research (which is what I call typing the name of a fairy tale into Wikipedia and skimming the page that comes up), I am back with another installment of the Grimm Fairy Tales Volume 2 Retrospective . I could harp on the fact that today's issue of interest is not based on a Brothers' Grimm fairy tale, but instead on a French spoken-word fairy tale. But if Zenescope had stuck to selections of the series' namesake, the company would not still be alive and kicking these twelve years later, and I wouldn't have all of this material to comment on. So on to the Grimm Fairy Tales  spoilentary! GFT #11: Bluebeard This is another fairy tale that I was unfamiliar with, but since reading this issue, I’ve seen shades of it in several horror movies, chiefly “ Crimson Peak .” In the framework around Bluebeard , a woman named Debbie has hired a private investigator (with the last name of Pinkerton , because wild west history and Zenescop...

Good morning, Ticketholders! I seem to "enjoy" discussing my faults a lot lately, from my lack of appreciation for a job I held for five years and my inability to start or maintain a meaningful relationship, to the fact that I had to get up at the sphincter of dawn this morning and run to work to deliver something important that I accidentally took home with me last night. I guess I'll just have to add global self-deprecation to my list of faults to discuss at a later date. Another fault of mine (one that has helped me not deal with all of the faults I notice in myself) is venting about the faults I notice in others. For the purposes of this post, let's call them warts, and begin with what a stretch the premise of today's issue of Grimm Fairy Tales is. GFT #10: The Frog King Sela teaches biology now, because plat convenience! It’s frog-dissection day, and pretty girl Lizette is grossed out by both her dead frog and her lab partner Neville’s birthmark. Enter...

Happy Breaking and Entering Day, Ticketholders! Just kidding. There is no national Breaking and Entering Day. Why would there be? It's a crime. It'd be like celebrating national Armed Robbery Day or Double Homicide Day or O.J. Simpson Day. I'm repeating myself here, but you get the idea. Of course, we do  commemorate September 11, 2001, which was the date of the worst act of terrorism on American soil since the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, and according to the hierarchy of illegal acts in this fair country, terrorism is at the top of the list next to treason, which is so bad that the punishment for it is also a crime (which is in turn punishable by itself in many states). But commemorating something is not the same as celebrating it, and we do not remember or celebrate 9/11 for the crime itself (though it is essential for the prevention of repeated history that we not forget that our country is as vulnerable as any other, if not more so), but for the strength of o...

They say the sky is the limit Well I guess it all depends on you And your views (in this American dream) Don't tell me that the sky is the limit 'Cause it ain't about what you can do It's a who knows who In this American dream                              -"Sky's the Limit"                                Yelawolf, Love Story It makes good song lyrics, and is a good mindset to have if one wishes to be successful, but there is something to be said about the unhealthy nature of obsession. That's why we have idioms like "too much of a good thing," "all things in moderation," "don't fly too close to the sun," and "the bigger they are, the harder they fall." It's also why we have the following issue of Grimm Fairy Tales . GFT #8: Jack and the Beanstalk After Snow White , Zenescope gets back to the on-the-nose writing, bu...

Welcome backward, Ticketholders and Fairy Tale fans! From Throwbacks to the Retrospective , it seems like that's the direction I've been taking creatively these days. Now, there's nothing wrong with looking back (unless there's a vicious animal chasing you down), so long as you move forward. If the arts have taught us anything, it's that if you progress forward enough, what was old will eventually be new again. Case in point, my re-reading of these old Grimm Fairy Tales comics. With the Volume One trade behind us, let's move forward in the past to Volume Two, where some of the cliffhangers from Volume One pay off rather quickly. GFT #7: Snow White This issue follows directly after the Legacy short story, with Sela visiting a sick girl named Stephanie, whose stepmother Terry is poisoning her as the means to a Munchausen by proxy scheme. Of course, Sela knows all about it and stops by to loan the book, recommending they both read Snow White and the Sev...

As promised in last issue of New Piece Offerings , welcome to the first issue of a series that I hope to use to thin the herd with regards to the content of my other two blogs, SW@ Ticket Archive  and SW@ Ticket's Greatest Hits , and use them to contribute to the overall view count of this massive blogging endeavor, which I rebooted here on Blogger back in February 2012. But as the most loyal of my Ticketholders may remember, the history of the Ticketverse stretches back much farther (April 14, 2004, to be exact). It's Thursday evening in Washington state, so here, for your reconsideration, is a Ticketverse Throwback  to  SWAT Ticket #14 (FROM August 12, 2004):  One might say that period films are automatically chick flicks (all references to the female period aside) because they usually involve a lot of English accents, talking, and romance. But that isn't always the case. There are period films for guys, too. Take Word Of Honor , for example. It's a made-f...

Okay, so I lied last time when I said there would only be two poems. Turns out I was actually stupid at least  four  times that year. Enjoy my well-written stupidity, Ticketholders! "Love" Luckiest man alive Lost in his mind Path crossed unawares Lost his mind Lost his Faith, who Never leaves his mind Fears change Tries to change his mind Moves on Gets stuck Mind over matter Much matter on his mind. Love.                                            - Sean Wilkinson "His & Hers" He knew her before they met; He didn't know her at all. Her hair, her eyes, her smile-- He wondered what lay behind it all. He took his time, He waited too long. He acted rashly, He lived cautiously. His thoughts quiet little insanities, Screaming of logic and truth. Love is love, Hers belongs to another, His belongs to her stil...

I once had what I thought was love. It was more of an infatuation, an obsession with the idea of love, than actual attraction to a person. But it blinded me all the same. I ignored her faults, and even thought some of them were endearing for awhile. But some combination of waiting too long and not being aware of the completely one-sided nature of our non-relationship (or that she already had two sides with someone else) led to drama that I spent several years trying to get over. In an effort to do so, I took the wise words of several of my favorite musicians, a few mythology references, and my own creative spirit, and came up with the following, originally titled "Prodigal Sun": "How I Learned to Stop Loving and Live the Day" Like the Prodigal Sun, I rise every mornin' Sailors take warnin' Cuz red skies are formin' In my head Like A Storm, an' The way you hate makes my heart warm, an' I try to reform, but I'm sick I li...

Welcome back, Ticketholders, to the Grimm Fairy Tales Volume One Retrospective ! The final issue of the first trade paperback (abbreviated in the comic book culture as TPB) in the series is GFT #6: The Robber Bridegroom . I was not familiar with this particular fairy tale either time I read the issue, so I couldn't speak to how true the comics stayed to their source material in this case. After some research, however, I can say definitively that there is little connection or faithfulness to either the Brothers' Grimm or the Joseph Jacobs (titled Mr. Fox ) version.  The comic book adaptation is another on-the-nose issue for Zenescope, with two sisters named Michelle and Tara fighting over a young man named John. Sela intervenes in the sisterly squabble with a “helpful” story about two sisters named Misha and Tendra who end up fighting over a “prince” named Ivan (because Ivan is a variation of John, get it?) and lose their lives because of it. Though the plots and c...

*yawn* Hiya, Tickethol--*snore* *mumble* Oh, sorry about that. I was up late last night, obsessively organizing something that meant nothing by the time I gave up on it at three a.m. And unfortunately, no one kissed me to wake me up this morning. Not only did I feel like I had stayed awake for a hundred straight years and spent last night getting drunk (the first of which is physically impossible without dying, and the second of which is false--sometimes regrettably so--because I don't drink), but my only motivation for shaking a leg and getting out of bed was someone, well, shaking my leg. I'll have to make up for my caffeine-fueled late night last night by cramming in some beauty sleep this afternoon. Speaking of beauty sleep, here we go. GFT #5: Sleeping Beauty Though it is no longer than any previous issue, this feels longer because so much is packed into each page. A college student named Brett has a crush on a girl named Haley, who uses him to cheat in class and tr...