April Fools' Day Surprise!

Article by Sean Wilkinson,

a.k.a. the Animeister of April Fools

I had originally planned to do a prank issue of Dragon Blog Z today, wherein I answered the question of what would happen if the original Dragon Ball and Z ended after the Cell Games and we went right into the Battle Of Gods movie, a.k.a. Dragon Ball Super's first anime arc. It was going to be something along the lines of "Goku's dead and Vegeta's a jerk because he never got that closure to his character arc from sacrificing himself against Buu, so there aren't enough pure-hearted Saiyans to do the God ritual when Beerus shows up, and he destroys Earth for wasting his time, the end." And that would have been when I announced the beginning of a new What If? (I have the beginnings of a first arc written for the real What If the Buu Saga Never Happened?) But the combination of my laziness and the thought that it would be disrespectful to do a Dragon Ball What If? prank a month after Akira Toriyama's death made me change my mind. So instead, the real prank is that I'm not doing a prank, and you get a new One Piece Multi-Piece instead.

One Piece Multi-Piece #4: Water Seven & Enies Lobby

So let's continue our search for the One Piece and set sail for this issue by remembering to Become A Ticketholder if you haven't already, commenting at the bottom of this post, helping out my ad revenue as you read, and joining my Crew on Tumblr, Reddit, Facebook, and LinkedIn to like what you see and receive the latest snail transmissions of news on my content.

Since the last One Piece Multi-Piece, I've come to realize that I haven't spoken much about the individual characters since the first entry.

I've mentioned plot points, fights, and a brief rundown of what each new Straw Hat's goal is. Seeing as how there are nearly three hundred episodes (filler is included in that count, even though I didn't watch much of it) holding up these next two arcs, there is bound to be content that I forgot, conflated, or glossed over. Things like how, aside from Luffy, Zoro, Usopp, and Chopper, their initial dreams have not been addressed. Luffy wanting to be King Of the Pirates is so set in his character that it's the sign-off line for every episode preview. Zoro is shown training or fighting in almost every arc to become the world's greatest swordsman, and as I mentioned in previous parts, this has involved him pulling new techniques out of his ass since at least Alabasta (of course, some grace is allowed, as much of the crew's down time at sea is off-camera). Usopp has seen a ton of character growth in his increasing "willingness" (?) to face unfavorable odds, adding an assortment of elemental, chemical, and gag Stars to his slingshot ammo, creating a weapon for Nami (now upgraded with Dial tech he acquired in Skypeia) and developing new psychological warfare techniques, in addition to maintaining the Going Merry to the best of his ability, as he progresses toward becoming a Brave Warrior Of the Sea. And even though he's become something of a sidekick to Robin and the new comedy relief of the Straw Hat Crew (not that there's a shortage of those...), Chopper's dream of being a famous traveling doctor is pure, waking life.

On the other hand, Sanji's search for the All Blue is both resolved (there was an anime canon episode where he won a rare fish from the All Blue in a cooking contest in Loguetown that totally undercut the difficulty of his quest) and tied so steadfastly to a particular place and moment that there is no visible journey for him, and he can get away with following Nami and Robin wherever they go, or feuding with Zoro, or cooking or buying ingredients to cook, or going off on his own to do cool spy stuff, none of which has any kind of serial narrative to it because his vices and chivalry get in the way.

Nami is much the same, as we see the remains of her adoptive mother's tangerine orchard on the Merry's deck and her navigation and meteorological knowledge play into the beginning of every arc somehow. But even though her dream is to chart the entire world, we don't see her draw any maps outside of the few flashbacks in Arlong Park. More often than not, we see her greed and frugality on display instead.

The unique case among the Straw Hats is Robin, whom we've seen express an interest in the Poneglyphs, the Will of D, and world history (with an emphasis on the Blind Century). But as to her own past, her true goal, and her allegiance, she has yet to voice anything definitive. And unlike the flawed (or is it just incomplete for now?) execution of the rest of the Straw Hats, I actually don't mind this. It gives One Piece an air of mystery to not know what the sultry burlesque cowgirl who can speak French and make Geiger-Cronenbergs with her hands is thinking. I mean, everyone wants Lady Dimitrescu to step on them, but I just want to be hugged, and maybe have my back cracked once a week; is that so wrong?

Uhh.... Anyway, Water Seven is the arc where things start to "really get good," and it begins with the crew discovering that even if you have some mysterious mechanic repair your burned and battered ship in the middle of the night and an inflatable octopus to break your fall, hitting ocean water from thousands of miles in the air after surviving hundreds of episodes of battle damage is going to majorly suck.

So, after chasing a giant sumo-frog who can swim like a human and almost getting hit by that "train to Hawaii" Charlie Sheen was talking about in Hot Shots!, the Straw Hats arrive at Water Seven, a seven-gated floating city with heavy Venice inspirations. But tensions arise when Robin abandons the crew to join CP9 (basically One Piece Black Ops Interpol who dress like the cast of a Guy Fawkes-themed Guns 'n' Roses tribute band), Usopp loses the money they got from exchanging Skypeia's gold (and he's beaten up several times by Frankenstein cyborg Elvis and his gang of Blaxploitation disco girls and Rocky Horror backup dancers) and one of Water Seven's premiere shipwrights (who I'm just going to call Minecraft Usopp) comes to them with hopeless news about the condition of their ship.

 Luffy (who seems willing to sacrifice the Going Merry, and perhaps the bonds of his crew, to achieve his dream) and Usopp (who has the closest bond to the Merry, especially after seeing the mystery mechanic in Skypeia) clash ideals and enter into a duel for their respective places in the crew, and more importantly, for the fate of the Merry. Little Garden may be where I began to respect Usopp, but this fight is where I began to like him as well. He loses because he's up against Luffy, but Usopp is at his most "Batman with prep time" here, pulling out every trick in his arsenal and nearly knocking Luffy unconscious.

So, yeah; Usopp gets to keep the Merry, but he is out of the Straw Hats!

As he tries to gather enough supplies to repair the Merry and prove Luffy wrong, a plot unfolds involving the cyborg Franky (formerly known as Cutty Flamme) and ship-building magnate Iceburg, both of whom apprenticed under a Fishman shipwright named Tom (the same species as Arlong and his crew). Tom was the creator of the sea train the Straw Hats encountered on their way to Water Seven, and was executed as an accessory to piracy for repairing Gol D. Roger's ship. However, it is also revealed that Tom was in possession of blueprints for an ancient battleship from the Blind Century, and that he passed them to one of his apprentices (it's Franky) before he died. Now, CP9 want the blueprints to give the World Government some leverage against the Seven Warlords, and they've manipulated Robin into their custody because she, too, may have knowledge of the Blind Century that needs to be buried one way or another.

On top of that, the masks and costumes that CP9 wear create a decent amount of mystery as to their true identities...but if you've seen a police procedural drama before, it's fairly obvious in most cases who they are.

Ooh! Speaking of masks, obvious mysteries, and "new characters," it's time to talk about my favorite part of Water Seven: the introduction of Sniperking!

Following his defeat by Luffy and savage beating by the Franky Family, Usopp is torn between his personal pride and his former friendships with the Straw Hats...so he puts on a mask and cape, deepens his voice, makes a bigger slingshot offscreen, and hopes no one will notice that he's Sniperking. The resulting comedy (everyone but Luffy and Chopper notices because they're hilariously dumb) is gold that doesn't overstay its welcome despite persisting for two arcs, it gives Usopp the personal security to try being the hero he wants to be, and he gets this whole Super Sentai-inspired anime opening sequence with a theme song that just takes over his debut episode like a Deadpool wall-break. "Sniper Island" is the music video to my life now.

The fights here are pretty much just "stall so the villains can escape with Robin and Franky to set up the next arc," but CP9 does introduce some new techniques called the Six Powers that can make it possible for a normal person to fight evenly with a Devil Fruit user (though all members of CP9 have also eaten Devil Fruits) by enhancing their speed, mobility, attack strength, defense, range, and other attributes. So while the fights on Water Seven lack finality, they look cool enough.

The back end of Water Seven, though, has the Straw Hats (with Sniperking joining later, and Sanji infiltrating the prisoner transport on his own like he's the protagonist of Snowpiercer) teaming up with the Franky Family and the remains of Iceburg's Galley-La Company elite shipwrights on board a beta sea train as they race to stop Franky's and Robin's executions in the next arc, Enies Lobby.

It's important to note that Enies Lobby is not an execution site like the platform in Loguetown, but more of a kangaroo court island where high-Bounty criminals are sorted out before being sent to the name-dropped Impel Down (which will get its own arc later) for imprisonment and torture, or to Marineford (not name-dropped here, but it will get its own arc later as well, and is both an execution grounds and an island of residence for Marine service families, which makes about as much sense as anything else in One Piece's world) to meet their final fate.

As such, the Enies Lobby arc is kind of a One Piece version of the Entry and Rescue arcs from Bleach, and follows a Horizontal Tower structure similar to Sanji's train escapades in the previous arc, just with Luffy as the focus.

As we have come to expect from him, Luffy ignores all established plans and slingshots blindly into battle, sending Marine fodder flying as he screams his shot-call about whose ass he's going to kick next. That ass belongs to the strongest member of CP9, the Leopard-shifting Rob Lucci (who was undercover in Water Seven as one of Iceburg's elite shipwrights, a Slash-inspired ventriloquist who spoke through his pet pigeon to disguise his real voice), but we won't get to that fight for awhile, as Luffy must first contend with the door-powered, horn-haired former barkeep, Blueno.

To talk about this fight, though, I have to talk about three things.

The first is the initial fight choreography. It's well-animated, and with Luffy being on the back foot because he hasn't fought a Six Powers user before Water Seven, we get to see something that looks like actual fighting and defensive strategy, rather than the screaming and flurries of blows and energy attacks that typify the battle shonen genre.

Second, Blueno uses his Door-Door powers to turn Luffy's face into a Puppetmaster reference, which is cool.

Finally, and what deserves the most discussion, is the debut of Luffy's Second Gear transformation. After merely defending himself for an episode (because shonen protagonists have to hold back to gauge their opponents and draw out the narrative of the fight), Luffy decides that if he's going to get anywhere with Blueno (or any other Six Powers fights that lie ahead), he needs to take his own power to the next level (the Second Gear, if you will). Now, like I was at first watch, you might be wondering what happened to First Gear, and the answer is both logical and underwhelming because there always and never was a First Gear; it's just Luffy's base Gum-Gum state that he's had from the beginning and it didn't need a name. You might also be asking where this form came from because neither the original Japanese nor the English dub really explain it that well. Luffy simply says that ever since he lost to Aokiji (one of the three strongest men in the Marines), he had been looking for a way to get stronger so he could protect his crew and friends, who are all weaker than him, and that "I'm glad I met you [guys]." By itself, this feels like as much of an ass-pull as Zoro suddenly being able to cut with wind projectiles, sense subatomic vibrations, and triplicate himself into a Hindu sword god. And if you consult the wiki on Second Gear, the explanation is either bullshit writing, or it frames Luffy as some sort of fighting genius because on sight alone, he figured out how Shave (the speed-enhancing Power) works, and used that knowledge in conjunction with his Rubber Man physiology to accelerate the blood circulation in his body and enter a Kaio-Ken-like state (Gear Two makes him fast enough to outpace a Shave master and strong enough to damage someone who has activated the Iron Skin Power, but puts intense physical strain on his body). Wherever Gear Two's explanation ranks on the bullshit meter, the technique itself is instantly iconic and gets way more screentime than the average shonen buffing technique.

Meanwhile to Luffy squashing Blueno, the combined Straw Hat, Franky Family, and Galley-La forces mow through more Marine fodder and are joined by two Giants (former crewmates of the dueling pirates from Little Garden, who were manipulated into serving as Enies Lobby gate guardians by being told that their fellow Giants were captured and sent to Impel Down, an obvious lie that gives Usopp/Sniperking an opportunity to be awesome and strategically useful in the face of literally imposing odds).

The really character-driven stuff comes with the exchanges between the captive Franky and Robin, and the leader of CP9, Spandam (a weak, pompous, ignorant bastard who wears a Mankind mask, fights with a transforming elephant sword, takes pleasure from beating up women, and is more than deserving of every broken bone Robin will give him later). We learn from these conversations that not only is Spandam a lying, manipulative, misogynistic asshole who deserves to be put in a wheelchair and then beaten to death with it, but his father was the piece of shit who launched the Buster Call (a Marine scorched Earth assault) against Robin's home in an effort to genocide its historians who were researching the Blind Century, and then framed her for it as a child. As a result, she became the youngest person in known history to have a multi-million-Berry Bounty (I've glossed over this, but Berries are the currency of the One Piece world, and Bounties are the series' numeric power-scaling system), which led her to a life of betrayed trust and constantly shifting allegiances as a "devil" and a "bringer of despair and disaster."

The one bright point in her youth came with Jaguar D. Saul (explaining her previously established fascination with that particular middle initial), a Giant (complete with weird, Japanese onomatopoeia laugh) Marine-turned-pirate who teaches her how to laugh and that she should never give up hope of finding true friendship. Her previously established history with Admiral Aokiji is also given some meatiness in this flashback, as he defeats Saul in battle, but helps Robin escape the ongoing carnage of the Buster Call.

As it turns out, the way CP9 convinced Robin to go with them and sacrifice herself was by threatening the Straw Hats (her long-desired true friends) with a Buster Call. But because CP9 is an organization of, by, and for despicable, lying, ruthless assholes, Spandam (accidentally, but he planned to do it all along) triggers a Buster Call on Enies Lobby to wipe out the Straw Hats, and Luffy, having heard all of this from Robin herself, declares war on the World Government by having Sniperking shoot a Fire Star at the WG flag before her tear-flooded eyes.

If you are reading this and haven't watched One Piece yet, first of all, go watch it!, and second of all, you might be wondering why, if Robin can make body-part bloom-ception on anything within her field of vision, hasn't she snapped Spandam like a twig by now. One reason was the leverage that he and the rest of CP9 had over her with the Buster Call threat. The other was this series' power-dampening substance, Sea Prism Stone. Because anime logic and made-up minerals and elements, Sea Prism Stone is the solidified essence of the sea, which is the one shared weakness of all Devil Fruit users, that neutralizes their powers and takes away their ability to swim. So, Robin has been wearing Sea Prism Stone handcuffs, and cannot use her powers with them on.

But with Robin shouting triumphantly that she now wants to live, Luffy and the rest of the Straw Hats (who are lined up on a rooftop across from Robin and Spandam like a Super Sentai team preparing to henshin and kick monster ass) leap into action in various matchups against the members of CP9, who all have numbered keys in their possession, only one of which matches Robin's Sea Prism Stone handcuffs.

Luffy, of course, goes straight for Rob Lucci and Robin, while Franky (who burned the warship blueprints and was able to escape now that he was no longer needed) and the other Straw Hats fight to obtain all of the keys. This is mostly just a comedy-relief stall tactic by both CP9 and the author (for example, the only female member of CP9 turns Sanji into a human soap bubble because he's a chivalrous pervert, Nami fights a kabuki performer who can control his hair with the Six Powers and says "yo-yoi!" every five seconds, and Zoro has to fight a Giraffe-Man while Sniperking is cuffed to his arm), but there are some highlights like Chopper turning into a rampaging monster after eating too many Rumble Balls (jawbreaker-sized pills that he previously used to fight in various Point transformations during the Drum Island part of the Grand Line material) in a short period of time, Nami using her upgraded Clima-takt to defeat the soap-powered Kalifa (whose design here, as well as the rose-themed costume she wore in Water Seven, are sure to ignite a few 2D crushes in those who aren't already simping for Robin), Sanji once again getting an opportunity to be a badass spy who saves the day at the last moment, Zoro busting out the aforementioned Hindu god form for the first time, and Luffy's battle with Rob Lucci.

As it turns out (and this was hinted at in a prior episode), Luffy also already has a Third Gear form! It looks spectacular and puts in work, but is my least favorite Gear so far for several reasons. Rather than increase his strength and speed like Gear Two, Gear Three has Luffy pull a Looney Tunes by blowing into his thumb and inflating his body, then concentrating that inflation into one of his arms or legs to make it gigantic while scaling up mass and density so it still hurts. In exchange, Luffy has a cooldown period where he deflates into a child-sized body after delivering a single hit. It gets even less of an explanation than Gear Two, undercuts the significance of Gear Two and itself by being an inferior technique and debuting so soon after the previous Gear, and I'm pretty sure he already used it in the bit of filler that I did watch back near the end of East Blue, just without the Gear designation or the cooldown form, which completely robs it of its specialness.

Which is probably why Luffy finishes the fight with Rob Lucci in Second Gear.

With collapsing and flooded buildings around them and concentrated Marine forces prepared to saturate Enies Lobby in cannon fire, Luffy breaks his limits and launches a desperate Gum-Gum Jet Gatling (his traditional rapid-fire punching attack, now so enhanced by his Second Gear form that his punches create sonic booms and pressurized air projectiles before they physically connect, and considering his red skin, the barrage of punches, and the steam coming off of his body, this probably inspired Ralf Jones' Climax Super in King Of Fighters from XIII onward) against Rob Lucci that is as satisfying as it is well animated.

However, this leaves Luffy unable to move (as is Chopper, after reverting from his rampage form), and the carnage of the Buster Call has trapped the rest of the Straw Hats like fish in a barrel. That is, until they are rescued by a surprise returning...character?...it's the Going Merry!

As it turns out (and as Franky speculated in a conversation with Usopp back in Water Seven), the mystery mechanic who repaired the Going Merry on Skypeia was the spirit of the ship herself (voiced by Brittany Karbowski, making her a literal spirit animal as far as I'm concerned), so the Going Merry is alive, and has followed them from Water Seven to rescue them and enjoy one last voyage.

Between Robin's backstory and rescue, and the Going Merry's return and subsequent funeral back on Water Seven, this arc is as strong with the tear-jerker moments as it is with the fight animation. That trend continues when Franky reveals that he's going to use wood from a legendary tree (which he bought on the black market with the money his Family stole from our heroes in the last arc) to build the Straw Hats a new ship, and Garp (the Vice-Admiral from the Coby/Helmeppo two-parter in East Blue) shows up with his two trainees for a reunion. Coby (who has trained in the Six Powers in the years since One Piece began) spars with Luffy, no one remembers Helmeppo because he's lame, and we and the assembled Marines and Straw Hats find out that not only is Garp's name Monkey D. Garp (making him Luffy's grandfather because the initial D is a family thing like it was for Jaguar D. Saul, and the Japanese convention of addressing people by their last name first holds true in the One Piece world), but Luffy's father is Dragon (a.k.a. Monkey D. Dragon), an infamous Revolutionary leader who may have been supporting the Rebel Army in Alabasta, as well as the man who saved Luffy from Smoker way back in Loguetown.

Also, the other hemisphere of the Grand Line (I think? This is where One Piece geography stopped making sense to me) is called the New World, and the Straw Hats decide to make it their next destination.

After that emotional roller-coaster of a double-arc and a few more filler episodes, Franky's ship is completed, and because he refuses to join the Straw Hats for macho reasons, they and the Franky Family steal his Speedo and make him run around Water Seven naked for two episodes to get it back. Totally unnecessary and (I'm struggling not to say "barely" or "hardly" because even risque puns are too highbrow for this level of attempted comedy, so I'll just go with) not funny, but eventually Franky agrees to witness the journey of his "dream ship" (the competently composited CGI powerhouse that is the Thousand Sunny) first hand because of a promise he made to Tom and Iceburg, and Usopp drops his disguise and his own macho insecurities and rejoins the crew. So the Straw Hats have a new ship, Robin and Usopp are officially back, and Franky has joined as the crew's shipwright.

Things can only get better from here, right?

Right?

Tune in next Monday for the answer to that question, and please remember to Become A Ticketholder if you haven't already, commenting at the bottom of this post, helping out my ad revenue as you read, and joining my Crew on Tumblr, Reddit, Facebook, and LinkedIn to like what you see and receive the latest snail transmissions of news on my content.

I'm gonna be Master Of the Tickets!